Is it wrong for my boyfriend to text & talk to his ex-girlfriends and not let them know he is in a relationship?

by Isabel
(Corpus Christi, texas)

Visitors Question

I have been with my boyfriend on & off for 9yrs. We have never lived together. He has broken up with me several times even though he says he loves me ive remained faithful to him & given him space. Three years ago he wanted to find a house for both of us to settle down.We found a 3bd rm on 2 acres the property needed alot of cleaning & house needed repairs. I helped him with everything from cleaning underneath the house while he was taking care of his mother cutting the yard trimming trees repairing the house etc. Ten months later of working on this house I was very curious because he always kept his phone on silence I looked and found several text from a woman asking if she could come over for sex and a text from him saying he was with his mother and couldnt get away. I text the woman back & told her he had a girlfriend & confronted him.He grew very angry with me told me I was a evil person stealing away his peace while he was asleep sneaking thru his cell phone. We broke up about 1yr ago we reunited he told me he missed me and he made a very big mistake to give him another try. I did we went back to the house and it was a complete mess the yard was about 4ft high branches were everywhere no work had been done we picked up and started working on it again it looks great now. I've been having doubts again and of course I went on his laptop & he has an account with a match making service & pictures of women emails asking for dates. I searched his phone he had been texting another woman for awhile I asked who she was he said just an old friend ive known for many yrs. I didnt think nothing of it & left it at that. Last night i found several text he sent out telling her he was watching the game with his buddies from work of course he lied he was with me watching the game. I got in his phone i feel so terrible i pretended I was him & text her that i just finished watching the game with my girl. She responded im upset to hear that. I text her back yes weve been together & we are working on moving in together for a year now. He found out what I had done he called me horrible names told me I was and evil fucken bitch & I wrecked his life and didnt want to have anything to do with me. that i had an evil demon in me & wasnt worth shit. Is he right I know i was worng for doing that but I was angry and hurt.

Answer
I have a question for you Isabel. If what you're telling me is true,(because there is two sides to every story and there is the truth), then why are you doing this to yourself?

You're going through his things because evidently you don't trust him. Go read some of my articles on the subject.

How can you be the evil demon and HE is the one lying to YOU?. You're falling for his stunts and I know your heart is involved and want to believe anything you want to sooth the pain.

Stop going through his stuff for future referenence, because when you search, don't be surprise when you find what you're looking for.

What did he say about the match dating service and having relationships with other women? Honey, you actually talked to a couple of women yourself and the evidence is right there.

Do you need an actual SLAP in the face to wake you up? How much do you have to see? My advice is to walk away and stay away.

He really doesn't need an explanation why because he already knows he is the reason but he wants you to believe it's you and not him.

I'm willing to bet you, in his head, when you fall for this and fall for that, he's really probably staring at you when you're eating or doing whatever and is saying DAM, HOW STUPID IS SHE REALLY?

I hope I didn't offend you with that one. The truth is if you stay, things will probably get worse.

I hope I've given you something to roll with. Good luck and all the best to you.





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