Am I wasting my time

by Keisha
(Philadelphia)

Visitors Question:


Hi, I have known this guy since I was 19. He moved away we broke up. Ran into him a few years later,I was still heart broken over someone else. So in that process we lost contact again.

Finally 2 months ago,which makes it 8 years since we last saw one another,we reconnected on Fb. From the beginning he was talking about marriage,and how were in our 30's and he has no kids. And he wants to try for real with us.

So I was all for it,because I've always been crazy about him,just bad timing. He goes on to tell me about his ex fiancee who broke his heart 2 years ago, and that we should take it slow. I agreed. Because I'm fresh out of a relationship as well. So we hang out,were intimate.

Hes romantic,attentive. Such a gentleman. Holds me all night all the good stuff. Then he leaves the next day. He stops texting and calling for three weeks. I'm hurt of course. I text him one last time,and he calls me.

Of course I curse him out, he doesn't get mad, he understood my anger. We start hanging again. He works from like 7am to 6-7 at night 6 days a week. So I get it he's tired. But he's still not calling,or texting. We spend like one day a week with each other. I want more.

We made plans to go to dinner ,still nothing. We always end up doing a night at a hotel which is cool,but I want to be dated. He pays for everything,won't let me spend a dime. Last weekend was the first time he actually let me buy him something to eat.

He offers to pay for my nails,pedis and other things. But is not putting in the time. Im just confused. And starting to really feel unwanted. Please help. As of now or last contact was 2 days ago. And I'm not calling first. Thanks for reading

Answer:

Well you need to start with sitting down with him and putting everything on the table. Maybe he doesn't want what you want right now or ever. You need to find that out immediately.

Find out how he feels and what he wants with you and if what he says is not enough for you, then you have some decisions to make.

Pay attention to what a person says and more attention to the persons actions, they speak louder than words.

Like disappearing for 3 weeks, that action speaks louder than words.

I hope I've given you something to go on. All the best, stay in touch and good luck.

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